clarice•ology

Dear God,

I’m feeling sick. Please clear my nosey.

Love, Clarice.

My Belgian relatives got me some eyeshadow and blush. Haha. I think they want me to look like a little asian Barbie doll. I never wear that much makeup on a daily basis! But it’s really cute.

Hmm, there’s a big chance that I’m going to my old parish for mass tomorrow. But by myself?! Wha, wha? Geez, my parents are all like, why go there when you can go to mass right here in my community. They’re missing the point. Haha. Oh well. Maybe if I go by myself, it’s better. Teehee. I wonder if they’re offering confession there. I feel like I haven’t gone in a long time. It has really only been like two months. And I’m not too much a bad kid either, I guess?

Happy birthday, Jesus!

By the way, I did get drunk off apple cider. Yay. Another thing to cross off my list! Hah. Our Noche Buena was really salty, so I had to drink a lot. You should of saw me. Or maybe not.

I have to clean up and attend to my slumber. Have a merry Christmas, y’all!

I just, just, just finished writing and sending Christmas cards to my beloved little Charlotte Webbers. Over this past summer, I spent a week at a Catholic Leadership camp as a counselor to fifth grade girls. And it was my first time being a counselor too.

At the moment, I miss them so much! I just want to live at camp. It’s basically my heaven on earth. The girls there keep me going. They’re my motivation. They fuel me in my love of my religion and I owe so much to this camp.

So anyways. Sleeping at three in the morning is bad. I shouldn’t be staying up all night. My baby is getting dropped off at my house early in zee morning and I get to babysit her all day. Maybe I’ll make some cash to fill my very empty wallet.

And after that, I’m planning to wrap of my friend’s presents to get them ready for delivery on Tuesday. Which I guess is now tomorrow since it is basically Monday. Hah.

Toodaloo, bugaboo!

If you had a bf/gf, would you make out with someone else for money? NO!

Do you go to church? If so, do you actually pay attention? Mhmm, and no. I try though!

Do you have a religion? I’m a proud Catholic.

Friends with benefits, just friends, or relationship? At the moment, friend with benefits because I can’t have a relationship.

What curse word do you say the most out loud? Fuck.

Have you ever farted in front of your boyfriend/girlfriend? Hah, now that’s not ladylike.

Ever ate any type of animal food? Almost! Dog snacks look like cookies.

Wished someone would just disappear? Now why would I want that?

Are you a polite person? I would say so.

Do you care about appearances? I’m a bit vain.

Last text was from? Kyle!

That’s all now. I’m sleepy. Peace! ☮

I miss when I got good grades. Hmm, well, you may call a 3.8 good. But I can’t. I am seen as not having enough responsibility. Like I was responsible when I was getting my straight A’s last year. Now that’s a joke. I would either go back to ninth grade and have crappy grades, or go back to August and cut all those issues out of life before s’more year started.

I hate being measured by my grades, rather than my personality or morality or character. My parents do that to my friends too. It sucks. Like big time. Not saying that anyone really does this to me, but what if one of my friends is a perfect student, and they treat me like crap? Now what? Hmm?

Okay, who told me about a movie with a girl who’s vagina had teeth in it?! I can’t remember. And it’s not my best friend, so who could it be? Who else would share such a vulgar idea with me. Hahah.

My friend said the exact same thing my mom said about me a few days ago. It’s really weird. Really, really strange.

I don’t like pig latin anymore! Trying to read it is giving me headaches. Ahay, ahay, ahay.

I don’t write much anymore. Hmm.

I’ve been told many stories lately. At first, they break my heart. But in the end, I just learn that I need to deal. This collection of stories never seems to cease from growing. He’s already started. She’s sneaking. He’s such a douche now. She hasn’t changed. He’s never had them. She’s playing him. He’s what everyone thought he wasn’t. She too restricted. He was always two faced. She sees a different side. He’s living a lie. She’ll never let this go. He’s never taken seriously.

Life’s full of people that you’ll get to know so well. But hearing about them… it just sucks. It’s like you never knew them. They were the people you thought they would never be. But what can you do? You need to let people live their lives, make their own choices, and all you can do is hope they learn from their choices. It’s called being a friend. Friends should never restrict another from doing what they want to do. We are all but fishes in this sea of adolescence. We all go through the same thing. No matter the extremities of everyone’s journey.

I like to blab a lot.

Fueled by a two pound bag of Twizzlers, I am determined to finish my World History project. And my chemistry lab analysis. And my math homework. If I feel like it.

Luckily, winter break is only one week away.

Sometimes, I want to go up to some people in my life and be all up in their face and go, “bite me.” But I really don’t have the guts to do that and I probably haven’t thought out my reason well enough yet. What a silly little girl I may be.

Hmm. I got to say that I’m not a fan of people who are basically created by their friends. Who live and breathe with the gasoline of peer pressure in their tanks. Trying to fit the popular mold of the modern teenager. Trying to be “a teenager,” and not who you really are. Try following your own goals on for size. I’m also tired of people who don’t do things because their friends aren’t. People who are afraid to try new things because it’s not on the bandwagon’s trail. I’ve been through that all throughout middle school, practically, and I’m sick of it. I’ve realized that that isn’t how I want to live through my last years in high school.

I don’t care what everyone else thinks!

By the way, yeah. I’ve grown way louder when I talk. I’ve noticed. By the weird looks I’ve been getting by surrounding people. Haha. Sowwy!